On the past and the present it made

I started this blog around 2005 as a daring teen, looking for a space of my own.

The things I've seen, the places I've been to, the people who touched my life (both positive and negative)--I have shared some of them here. Not to mention my usual occasional rambling-filled entries, this site is indeed me.

But when I read some random entries from way back, I couldn't help but think, "I really wrote this?"

If I have to describe the feeling, I suppose that it wouldn't be much different from time-travelling (not that I've ever done so).

Entries from the past provide a background to contrast the present me and the previous me as if to say, "You've changed."

As to the extent of change and the kind of it, I'm still pretty uncertain. But I'm quite happy with my discovery because we always pretend to remain the same that we prevent ourselves from moving forward. May it be good or bad, we just have to embrace that change in us rather than be stuck as someone we no longer recognize.

With that said, I guess I no longer am the same daring teen when this blog first started.

But who I am now could not be without being that teen back in 2005. And before 2011 ends, I would like to relish the moment that I came to understand a bit more and welcome the path that another year will bring. So that when that time comes, I'll be prepared to accept whatever lies ahead.

Just Dropping By

Huwaaa~

Spent the entire day catching up with my kdrama fix. I'm such a bum! :|

Oh well, better cherish such moments. I wonder when I'll be able to have so much time again. Heehee!

I'll update soon when I have done more sensible things. :)

Colors from East to West

Usually, experiencing a new culture requires travel and a lot of money. But today, I feel so lucky to have attended a Japanese tea ceremony demonstration and a performance by Quatuor Diotima String Quartet without the need to fly to Japan or France.

I think I have posted enough entries to express my fascination with Japan and its culture. And it has always been a dream of mine to witness, if not take part, in a Japanese tea ceremony or, in Japanese, cha no yu. Witnessing the demonstration made me realize all over again Japan's "obsession" with restraint and order which is incomprehensible yet sensible to me. 

Despite the seriousness and solemnity called for by the tea ceremony, I was still able to enjoy the occasion due to a couple of things. Seeing my sensei in her kimono as she performed the ceremony got me totally amazed. Watching my classmates' attempt on the said art was kind of amusing too. But the fact that I got to taste the wagashi and authentic matcha made by sensei sent me immediately to cloud nine. Too bad I wasn't able to bring a camera and take pictures to share though. :(

Just after attending the cha no yu demonstration, my friend and I immediately went to the venue for Quatuor Diotima's performance. We arrived a bit late as the quartet already started their first song so we had to wait before we can enter the hall. Too bad for us youngsters as a strict-looking lady scolded us while we waited at the lobby. :|

To be honest, I have a love-hate relationship with classical music. But when we were invited by a friend to go see a French string quartet FOR FREE, I'm like, 'why not?'. And, the invitation really came on time as I am currently rekindling my affair with classical music since last month. I realized that it helps me keep my sanity through all the things I have to do. 

I can't help but respect Quatuor Diotima and, along with them, all those who are so dedicated to playing instruments. I really felt goosebumps while listening to them perform and sometimes, I would get so carried away by the melody the my head sways to the beat. Watching people like them inspires me to just be good at what I can. I mean, if they can affect me so much by being so good in their music then, I must work hard to be good in my craft too before I can start aspiring to influence others in a positive light. I feel sad that I am not able to speak French. I wanted to express me appreciation but I can't. (As if I can do such thing in Japanese if I will be able to attend a Yuki Kajiura performs. LOL!) Maybe I should start studying French too?

In the end, my friends and I got to get a picture with the quartet members. :P 

I'm really thankful for this day. Makes me love my school even more for bringing in such rare opportunities closer to students. 

MORE! MORE! :D

Promised Memories

Back in preschool, somebody told me that I am special. I responded with a toothy, childish grin because I believed.

Elementary days came by and someone said that I'm capable of great things. I held on to it.

My teen spirit wanted to run free. But you said that I should wait. I did.

Long years are gone and we're almost at the finish line. Yet you say, forget everything.

It's breaking my heart. Because for so long, I placed my faith in you only to hear you say it's over.

They say there's beauty in waiting. But it pains me to realize that I was made to wait for nothing.

Perhaps it's foolish to continue holding on. It's all I have.

I have waited this long. Maybe a few more years wouldn't hurt so bad.

Though it's useless if I'm the only one who's all in.

I'm not closing any doors because I remember you telling me that we'll always be together.

Hopefully, it's not yet forgotten. Because I don't mind returning to dust if we're all together.

Forever.

New Paths

Today marks another occasion of opportunities.

A chance of start anew.

A chance to believe once more.

A chance recover what we once had lost.

A chance to heal and have faith in love.

Happy Easter to you.